Most people have experienced the death of a loved one at least once in their lifetime. In Gayle Forman’s novel I Was Here, Cody Reynolds had to live with the fact that her best friend, Meg, took her own life at a tender age. Cody had known Meg since they were young; they were practically sisters.

Cody loved the thought of having Meg as a sister because Meg’s life seemed to outshine her own. Cody was the daughter of a woman who paid more attention to the new men in her life than her daughter, and her father had abandoned her before she met him. Meg, on the other hand, seemed to have the perfect life. She had parents who loved her, financial stability, warm meals at the table, and overall a good home. Therefore, Cody was shocked when she heard about her best friend’s death. She had never seen any suicidal tendencies in her friend’s behavior, and they told each other everything. Was this her fault? Cody was struggling without her better half, so when she found some secret files on Meg’s laptop, she wanted to investigate. Along the way, she meets Ben, a boy Meg was involved with one way or another. As Cody tries to find out the reasons behind her friend’s death, she discovers secrets Meg was hiding and that her friend’s suicide was more than it appeared.

Suicide is a controversial subject in books and movies; most don’t like addressing this subject. Cody couldn’t accept that her friend had committed suicide, believing that there was more to it than what Meg’s parents told her. Cody decision to investigate only leads to more problems. Cody shouldn’t have investigated, especially because every sign showed that it was Meg’s decision to end her life. Cody felt resentment  that her best friend didn’t inform her of this decision. Cody wanted to believe that there was more to Meg’s suicide because not knowing would make her a bad friend. Guilt made Cody choose rash, and frankly dumb, decisions that other characters in the novel advised against.

I Was Here is a 270 page novel that took me about a week to read. If you get stirred up by topics such as suicide or depression, I would advise against reading this novel. However, the novel does show how suicide affects family and friends. In the case of Cody, it shows how pain can cause a person to make foolish decisions.